Poor Sayer
by LordAce1213 aka Blitz9684
Summary: ...Simply because life as the Arcadia movement's leader wasn't as smooth as he would like you to believe, especially when he's got an annoying little duel spirit following him around in the form of Esper Girl. How long until the Psychic duelist snaps?


**Disclaimer:** If I owned Yu-Gi-Oh, Kaiba would be king of games, nuff said.

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I hate this...

Sayer hated kids, there was nothing about them he could find likable no matter how hard he tried (assuming he tried in the first place). He hated everything about them, from the way they spread their germs all over Neo Domino city, to the way they kicked his shin every chance they got and scuffed up his pants. Needless to say, he wasn't pleased when Akiza approached him with the idea of opening a day care center for the Arcadia Movement main building.

"...Surely this is some sort of joke." He said coldly, behind his calm and smooth exterior, his brain was screaming 'Hell no! Hell to the fuck no!'

"Actually, no. As you know, the Arcadia movement doesn't have the best public image. What better way to improve our relations with Neo Domino City than by catering to children?" Akiza explained, somewhat confused by the look Sayer was giving her, his normally cool expression was replaced with a blank stare that showed pure annoyance.

"Not to mention we might find new recruits?" She added, and that's when Sayer began to pay attention. If there was anything the Arcadia movement was looking for, it was new members, and he knew it. Sayer thought about the pros and cons list in his head, on one hand...he'd have to deal with kids. He grimaced at the very thought of having a bunch of ankle biters around him, on the other hand; it would improve the movement's public image, as well as be a possible recruiting section. Not to mention it would get Akiza off of his back for the moment, as much as he valued(?) the girl, keeping her on her leash was getting tough as of late. Despite having enough info on her as the black rose to keep her tame, he would like to avoid having her powers used against him, and that meant keeping her happy.

"So will you take this into consideration?" Akiza asked, snapping her boss out of his train of thought.

"Very well, we will try it." He replied, back to his calm and collected self. Akiza brightened up considerably, something that was unlike her whenever she got involved in anything that wasn't Sayer related.

"I'll go have the staff set everything up." She said, leaving before Sayer could even say anything. He sighed and got back to his papers, he had another meeting today with Goodwin, probably about his little 'secret'. That, or Goodwin wanted to say something about his actions after Yusei defeated Akiza. He assumed it was the former without a second thought.

'At least I don't have to deal with the little brats...' He thought to himself, smirking as he got the idea to put Akiza as the one in charge of her precious day care center, better her than him he thought.

"C'mon, you don't have to be such a meanie, you know?" A rather...happy voice chirped up from behind Sayer.

"What the? Who's there?" He shouted, turning around in search of the source of the voice. He found no one, but he was certain he wasn't hallucinating.

"Down here, silly!" The voice said from in front of him, he turned to his desk and looked down, then jumped back out of pure surprise.

"Hey! That's not a very polite reaction!" The voice was coming from a little ghost that resembled the Esper Girl card that was standing on his desk, she looked upset at his little freak out, and was glaring at him with her hands on her hips for emphasis.

"What's going on here? ...Perhaps I left it on my duel disk...?" Sayer thought out loud, sometimes he would leave his cards on the duel disk, and sometimes that caused little incidents like these.

"First of all; I'm not an 'it', I have a name. It's Esper Girl, but you can call me Ella! Second of all, I'm not on your stinking duel disk, I'm a duel spirit." Esper Girl shouted as Sayer checked his duel disk for any cards that were lying on the projector. When he saw that there were no stray cards on it, he gulped as he questioned his own sanity.

"...You're nothing more than a hallucination, get out of my office, I have work to do." He commanded, actually a bit disappointed in himself for playing along with his brain's sad idea of a joke.

"No can do, pal. I'm YOUR duel spirit, it's my job to guide you and keep you company." The girl said happily, floating next to Sayer's head (Much to his chagrin).

"No, you're a figment of my imagination, an unwelcome one at that, get out of my sight." He growled, trying to swat the little girl away.

"Could a figment of your imagination do...THIS?" Esper girl asked as she bonked (yes, bonked) Sayer over the head with her staff. He was, needless to say, surprised when the staff actually hurt him...if only slightly.

"You little brat!" He shouted as he wrapped his hand around the spirit, bringing her close to his face, and before he could say anything while making the scariest face humanly possible...

"Um, Sayer?" Akiza walked in with a few papers for him to sign, though she was wondering if her boss was 'all there' after seeing him act like that.

"Ack! Akiza, how long have you been standing there?" Sayer asked, still keeping a firm grip on the little girl, who was squirming in his hand.

"Uh...I just walked in, is there a problem here?" Akiza asked, somewhat worried about Sayer. Sayer cleared his throat and went back to his smooth self before holding out his hand, the one with the Esper Girl in it.

"This is the problem, we must research this thing at once." He said triumphantly, though Akiza wasn't quite sure what he was talking about. To her, it looked like he had a strained grip on thin air.

"Um, you're...not holding anything...?" She asked innocently, to which Sayer got a little annoyed.

"How do you not see this little demon in my hand? She's right here!" He damn near shouted. That's when Esper girl began to chuckle.

"I wouldn't stress this that much if I were you. She can't see or hear me, no one but you can, actually." She giggled, that's when he glared at the spirit big time.

"NOW YOU TELL ME?" He shouted, then glanced back over to Akiza, who was dialing a number on her cell phone.

"Who are you calling?" He asked as calmly as he could.

"Oh, just a few doctors. I'm making you an appointment for next week, and no buts!" Akiza commanded, Sayer was about to say something about her being insubordinate, but she left again before he could speak. After a bit of lamenting over this new turn of events, he turned his attention back to the little girl.

"...Do you have any IDEA HOW BAD YOU JUST MADE ME LOOK?" He shouted, but before Esper girl could respond, Sayer continued his rant.

"Do you know how BAD it is for someone as important as myself to look like a maniac?" Unbeknownst to both Sayer and the Esper Girl, two security officers were in the surveillance room making sure to record each and every moment before uploading them for all the world to see.

"Sayer, meet YouTube." One of them said evilly while the other called every newspaper he could get the number of.

"Well maybe if you were more cooperative I wouldn't have to act like this." Esper Girl said, sticking her tongue out at Sayer. Sayer felt his veins pop out onto his forehead, but then he got an idea. He took all of the pens and pencils out of the cup he put them in, put the little girl on the table, then slammed the cup over her before she could fly away.

"That should shut her up." He thought out loud before getting back to his work, he began to sift through some files before he noticed a small pair of feet kicking from in front of his face.

"You're not very bright, are you? Spirits can pass through things, you know?" 'Oh God...why?...Why me?' Sayer thought to himself as he tried to swat the Esper girl from atop his head.

"Alright, what do you want? I'm a busy man, so make this quick." He muttered with the slightest hint of defeat in his voice.

"I just wanna be your friend~!" The girl replied, floating around the poor man's head.

"If I call you my friend, will you please leave me in peace?"

"Yup, scout's honor!"

"Fine, we can be friends..." And just like that, the girl disappeared. 'Thank...God...' He thought to himself as he decided to drink out of his coffee cup.

"So what do you do here, anyway?" Sayer spit out his coffee, and before he could shout and curse.

"Ew, gross!" The girl was pointing at the mess he made on his desk.

"I thought you said scout's honor?" He shouted.

"When did I say I was a scout?" Esper girl replied.

"THAT'S IT!" He yelled as he got his duel disk out, he began to pull cards from his deck until he drew the card he was looking for.

"I summon you, Esper Girl!" He yelled as he slammed the card onto the duel disk. Esper girl disappeared for a moment, the reappeared in front of Sayer, no longer ghostly.

"What was the point of that?" She asked, she was a bit taller now, pretty much the size of a real child. She even jumped up and down, apparently enjoying the effects of gravity.

"Hey, I'm real now!" She squealed happily, but then she got a little scared when someone grabbed her from behind by her shirt collar.

"Specifically, you're corporeal now. Can you guess what that means?" Sayer said very menacingly, Esper girl gulped before he finished.

"It means I can punish you now for being a bad girl, and man, have you been a bad girl." He growled, dropping the little girl on the ground. Before he could make any more threats, she kicked him in the shin before running out of his office.

"Get back here, you little demon!" He shouted before running after her.

"C'mon, I just wanted to have a little fun!" Esper girl whined, then ran even faster when she realized Sayer was placing a card on his duel disk.

"Hinotama!" He shouted as the fireball barely missed Esper girl.

"I'll show you fun! I'm going to have a lot of fun, you monster!" He yelled.

Now, if you were in the Arcadia Movement and you saw your boss threatening a little girl with fire, what would you do? ...If you answered 'Get popcorn and watch the boss lose his shit' you'd be correct, and that's exactly what some of the Arcadia Movement's members did.

"Okay, you're getting scary now!" Esper girl screamed as Sayer activated is Psychic Sword spell card, he held it very menacingly above the girls head, and he was just about to end all of his problems until...

"SAYER! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" Akiza shouted. '...crap...' Sayer thought before turning to face his prize understudy.

"-sniff-...He was being mean to me, miss..." The Esper girl sobbed, running in between Sayer's legs (And making him fall over in the process), then clinging to the signer, feigning fear.

"Aw, don't worry...the big meanie won't hurt you."

"You wanna bet?" Akiza shot Sayer a glare so frightening he began to inwardly pray to every God he could think of so that he would come out of this alive.

"What's your name, little one?"

"-sniff- Ella..."

"Well Ella, I'll make sure he can't scare you anymore." 'Wait, I'm the boss around here, not her!' Sayer thought to himself.

"Listen, Akiza, this-"

"BLACK ROSE DRAGON!"

….

….

….

"So, how are you feeling?" Esper girl asked, having returned to her ghostly form. She floated around Sayer, who wasn't doing very well. He was lying in a hospital bed, pretty much in a full body cast. He strained to turn in the girls direction, and squinted before speaking.

"...I hate you...so much..." He growled quietly. Esper girl giggled before floating over to give Sayer a peck on the cheek.

"Well don't you worry mister, I'm gonna say here until you're all better~!" She said happily in an attempt to piss him off. It worked, because for the first time in what seemed like forever, Sayer began to cry.

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LordAce: Well here's the product of what happens when you take a bored author at 2 in the morning on a sugar rush. Dunno why everytime I write something I feel the need to torture a character or two.

Esper Girl: So what gave you this idea?

LordAce: Well you're just so adorable! Sayer needs to cheer up and get that stick out of his ass, and you're just the duel spirit for the job.

Esper Girl: All of this is true, but why do you hate Sayer?

LordAce: I don't, I was just a little bored, and this was fun. Who knows? This might become a series.

Esper Girl: Yay! Screentime!

LordAce: I'll still be continuing my Castlevania fic 'Castlevania Badass Protagonist Club' so it's not like I'll be leaving the people reading that hanging, this is just expanding my horizons a bit. Read and Review, if you would be so kind.


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